Saturday, December 10, 2011

My First Indian Wedding



 
Some of the first people that many of the Newbies at AES met upon our arrival in Delhi were our drivers for the first two weeks. Maxwell happened to be my driver and I got to know him well. A most gracious and caring man, Max promised that if there was a wedding in his family he would invite some of us. So when the invitation came for his sister's daughter's wedding I was overjoyed.

Maxwell and his father at the wedding.

Indian weddings can typically go on for three days. This wedding was unusual because the couple was being married in a Catholic church, but they were still celebrating in a traditional Indian way.

Two nights before the wedding, the bride is adorned with turmeric and sandalwood by the women on her side of the family. Her simple muslin saree (sari) is also rubbed with the mixture, as well as her hair.  Gifts of food and flowers are placed around her.


The second night for the bride is the mehndi (henna tattooing) ceremony. The bride and her closest family friends and relatives are painted in intricate henna designs. The bride has both her arms and legs adorned. It took three hours for her mehndi to be finished, then hours of drying and chafing off the extra henna. A mixture of lemon juice and oil are dabbed over the henna to enhance the penetration.





As the bride patiently sits through this process, her brothers, uncles, aunts,sisters, and mother sing and dance for her. In fact, we all danced. She cried throughout the process because this would be the last days together with her side of the family.

In the corner a woman sat cutting vegetables and making a pot of curried vegees for the guests.

Then it was my turn to receive the mehndi. The lovely young women who did my hands (not feet), had a sweet daughter who sat quietly throughout the whole procedure. 

Nancy, my team teaching partner, and I kept shaking our heads at the wonder of it all. We were instantly made a part of the family and were treated like royalty for the next two days.

The young girls had marigolds woven into their braids for the mehndi ceremony. Prospective brides?


The next day a bathing process occurs for the bride to prepare her for the actual wedding day.  No, we were not part of this very private and special time for the bride to spend time with her mother and closest female family members for the last time. Once she is married, she will move in with the groom's family and say goodbye to her family.

Nancy, Katrina (another teacher from AES), and I set out about 6 pm for the wedding. Selecting and having our sarees made was quite a process. That's another story for another time! However, how do you put on a saree? Thankfully, Nancy's wonderful housekeeper was more than willing to drape and pin us. 



We were unable to attend the actual church service as we had to teach. But we arrived in time for the cake cutting, gift giving and dinner. Well, part of it anyway. There were over 600 guests coming and going all throughout the evening. Plenty of dancing and eating.
Upon our arrival, Max greeted us and sat us in the front row, in front of his family!! This type of treatment in India continues to overwhelm me. Teachers are so valued and honored. Plus being Americans, we are revered.  I am continually humbled. Max's family greeted us with hugs and kisses as if we had been part of their family forever. And lots of photo shoots!



The bride and groom, Remika and Dicky. Yes, this was an arranged marriage. Because they are Christian, she wore a white gown. Hindi brides wear red.

The young boys wear embroidered suits.
Max's wife and sister.I truly need more bangles!

The dancing went on for hours and I marveled at the amazing Bollywood dancing. We danced until our sarees started to fall off, so we made a very early exit. I'm sure the festivities went on all night. 

Much thanks to Max and his incredible family.